There are just so many words, so many thoughts. I wept today for my son. My son, who would be turning nine in just one week. My son, whose fifth birthday will forever be burned into my mind. My son, whom I miss a terrible deep hurt that words just don't really do justice. My son.
As I wept over words that were spoken and written. A good weeping of missing him and cherishing memories and being in awe of the God of our universe, who bends down to meet us in our grief. A weeping of pure joy from the encouragement and friendships we have surrounding us. Once again I am humbled.
I didn't expect to make it this far. Four years ago I didn't know that was his last birthday here on earth. I couldn't see my future. If I could have known then what I know now, I would venture to say I would not have reveled in the peace that God pours down. I would not have learned to live in joy or treasure the small things. If I would have known the outcome, I would have worried about the big things and tried too hard to soak up the small. I would have missed out on the wondrous everyday because I would have tried to squeeze in every life experience that I have come to regret not giving him. And then full circle, I am thankful for not giving him every earthly thing.
Blessings from chaos. Joy in grief. Steadfast in the unknown.
Gifts, treasures, memories.
Thao's birthday is coming soon. And we've done donuts and photos and parties. We've done quiet dinners and favorite foods. But this time, I'm sharing a new way to celebrate our sweet boy's life.
Please visit room423bibles.com
Please pray for this ministry of giving true hope to families in often hopeless situations.
I will share more about my sweet boy. There is more to come, Jesus is still restoring my soul.
As I wept over words that were spoken and written. A good weeping of missing him and cherishing memories and being in awe of the God of our universe, who bends down to meet us in our grief. A weeping of pure joy from the encouragement and friendships we have surrounding us. Once again I am humbled.
I didn't expect to make it this far. Four years ago I didn't know that was his last birthday here on earth. I couldn't see my future. If I could have known then what I know now, I would venture to say I would not have reveled in the peace that God pours down. I would not have learned to live in joy or treasure the small things. If I would have known the outcome, I would have worried about the big things and tried too hard to soak up the small. I would have missed out on the wondrous everyday because I would have tried to squeeze in every life experience that I have come to regret not giving him. And then full circle, I am thankful for not giving him every earthly thing.
Blessings from chaos. Joy in grief. Steadfast in the unknown.
Gifts, treasures, memories.
Thao's birthday is coming soon. And we've done donuts and photos and parties. We've done quiet dinners and favorite foods. But this time, I'm sharing a new way to celebrate our sweet boy's life.
Please visit room423bibles.com
Please pray for this ministry of giving true hope to families in often hopeless situations.
I will share more about my sweet boy. There is more to come, Jesus is still restoring my soul.