Tears welled up in their eyes. Parents living this unexpected, unaccepted, uncomfortable life. Life of loss and love. Life of knowing grief and questioning all things normal. They looked at me like I knew the answer to their question, “how? How do we do this? How do we go on and move on and keeping living?”
Grief Mamas and Daddies- I don’t know. I don’t really know how to do this. I’m here, a few years ahead of you and I am still learning But what I have learned is this: it doesn’t go away.
Death still stings this side of heaven.
Love always hurts when it’s lost.
Grief is a dance that ebbs and flows.
Some days it rains. Some days it pours. Some days the sun peeks through.
Life should not be wasted or wandered away.
So I’m not sure what the “how” looks like for you or for today or for your family or your future, but it definitely looks like something. Something more, something different, something bigger than ourselves.
Break our hearts for what breaks yours, Lord. Grief mama, we’re halfway there. Our eyes are opened and our hearts are shattered and it’s time to fill these cracks with Jesus. Fill us up, Lord, fill us up and overflow. Mend the broken and break us more. We know, we feel, we live the brokenness of this world. Lord, help us to use this mess for you. This heart break for you. This utter despair, wandering and wondering, to settle more into you. Help us to use the chaos to find your peace. We surrender all these shattered dreams and altered plans. Lord fill them, fix them, place your desires into our broken hearts and carry us through. Push us, pull us, we just need more of You.
Hands lifted high, Lord, all of us. Open palms, tender hearts, falling to our knees in beds of tears and resting in your shadow. That’s all we need to get us through, more of You.